Monday, November 29, 2004

2004-11-29 at 1:33 p.m.


Kev!n is quite upset and disillusioned with his friend, Pat. We'd been trying for a year to get him and his wife to come out to see our new house, plus, we wanted to meet their new baby boy.

Kev!n and Pat played phone tag for months, or if they were able to make plans to get together, Pat always had something come up that forced him to cancel his plans.

They finally had agreed upon Saturday for us to get together. I cleaned all day Friday and shopped Friday night to get the food we would barbeque. Kev!n called Pat Saturday morning to find out what time they wanted to come out and to give him directions. That's when Pat told him that they couldn't come after all, because of a family emergency. He suggested we shoot for Sunday. He would call Kev!n back that night to confirm.

He never did.

This has happened time and time again. Something is always "coming up". There's always a family emergency or prior engagement. I feel, and so does Kev!n, that we're being put off. We've decided not to call anymore. It doesn't take a load of bricks to fall on our thick heads - Pat doesn't want to see us.

I'm perplexed as to why though. We don't know his wife very well - is it a problem she has with us?

Is it a racial thing?

Is it a "we're overweight - they're not" thing?

Have we said or done something to offend them?

I feel the same thing happening in my friendships. I call - my friends don't. I make attempts to get together with my friends - they don't. I feel like I'm reaching out, desperately trying to hang on to a thread of friendship, but no one is grabbing ahold and helping.

My friend, Mel!ssa, for example. She had her babies. A month ago. Did I find this out because she bothered to call me? No. Did she send a birth announcement? No. I had to GOOGLE her to find out that she gave birth. I realize she's overwhelmed now with newborn twins, but please... her other friends were called or notified. In looking back, I realize now that the past dozen or so times we talked, I was the one to call her. Maybe I should take a hint. My friends let me down time and time again.

I don't mean my online friends. Those of you who email or IM (on the rare occasions I have time to IM!) are all I have. Online friends are the best. Although...

I have a group of people right here at diaryland that have snubbing me. I read their diaries, leave comments, notes, sign guestbooks, send emails... and in return I get nothing. This has been going on since - can you guess when - election day! I think it's sad and ridiculous that something as stupid as politics could stand in the way of friendship, between people who otherwise have a lot in common.

So I guess today I'm feeling a tad lonely and dispensable. Maybe it's PMS or maybe I'm just tired of being a nearly 40 year old woman who is like a kindergartner just starting school, trying to strike up conversations with people in hopes of being their friend.



last & next

new old profile notes design host